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blake uptin

sharing some entertaining thoughts and explanations with some privacy too under a pen name

another year here so let's see how tonight is

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September 09, 2021

day's over catching the ride with my parents home alexandria nights

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some thoughts on religion and money

October 31, 2021

so i did see that the father in the catholic church can be a massive power like if you think oh i have to pay for every song and show up different answers about that and not going to how you got to that so a different choice and two another option hmm thinking other people could be a father figure so there was dr machmer and another robbie t so that being maybe single male power whether that's like the melting pot restaurant regularity or the africa peace corps money different things going on on that so gamblers making sense of anything the water essence from owners another so there's the it was oh the bob dylan story so that being like like keith that falling under spells (heroine guitar hobo legend um) someone whose like this not possible figure and maybe that groups tricks on it when i ignorantly was fascinated with the jewish community (thinking things like world wars holocaust) so explaining it some um the term i told taking back sunday in a comment was like a dalai lam...

Was I a fool to not try to have more sex overseas? Is sex just not plain possible with married parents see the priest extorting us. Am I perpetually alone was that what I wanted? Being confused about what to do having my projects shut down as of now.

July 04, 2025

Was what i actually wanted to do be sexually active? But going back when that stuff was available there were always issues like housing income passion (even family obligations) etc. Another part would be in general the issues with logistics see the men with power over the women cutting me off like the government the school system the military the work force etc (complaints and police). So was I the whole time actually just trying to be promiscuous (but how many times did the references on that stop doing what they wanted like David Bowie or Anthony Kiedis EG)? I didn't know sex work and still haven't learned that much. For example prostitution is illegal. So I have tried the paid pornography and that seemed to show normal sexually active males. I remember when I was pursuing the music along the way people would confuse me or play devil's advocate bringing up the sex industries as opposed to the successes with eg guitar or literature. A story I actually remember was I went t...

producing my label and company film projects collabs and unfinished supplies

November 18, 2021

so lots of materials to finish restock and continue with paint tubes brushes canvases recording batteries books and other stuff unread guitar strings other studies miniatures blogs using up what i have maybe replace a camcorder sketchbooks hmm the ideas for paintings detailing and storage music practice the formal guitar accumulating the cassettes working through miniatures getting official views on online accounts fresh video projects what locations are possible who will team up building up progress for guitar and maintaining goals a functioning network talk with strangers have more after that activities initially noting the youth sports with the parents some preretirement hunger and drive like seeing other names that were strong though being retired and comfortable keeping my family well and focus on my future too housing thinking of when i heard about that rocky story a part about sly stallone going in a train car with a dog that farted or li...