blake uptin

 Does English trump the art? So the artist has some story that has holes in it that make it not worth it as much afterwards like Claude Monet's spouse dying or Gustav Klimmt's parents dying too. So respecting the school system. What reference can we really use generously and without looming undisclosed problems? How can we all get the university experience delivered to us? There's the college literature (like the Dew Breaker book Edwidge Danticat or Nickel and Dimed book Barbara Ehrenreich). But what's in bounds for us as a community and neighborhood and country? It seems like without the school their can be a lack of dignity or stimulation but using it can also seem unaffordable or too exclusive and out of reach. So this Republican party trend with the school system. What is the exact pinpointed derivative of college? Is it the audtiorium is it the professor is it the cafeteria is it the campus and extracurriculars? Then what can we do to extract some of this and infus...

 Here was the story in my head. Clozapine would make me sexually active like the character F by Nicoloas Bro in Nymphomaniac. So there'd be some side effects that wouldn't be too bad like putting on weight. I'd be fine with them and could see how that could help with my goal of being sexually active. So it wasn't like I had to be JD Salinger some of that was like a soldier who has to meet his objectives. I prioritized my parents over my brother but didn't really want anyone to die. But the vulgar temptation of being with women. It would be nice to see people from the past or have an advantage in the bedroom. So some side effects peeing the bed while asleep at night constipation potential seizures gaining weight and prolonged erections. Was this just a fantasy? I think some of this was previous things that greatly affected me like Haldol (can be used on parrots and was used on soviet dissidents according to Wikipedia) which was a older antipsychotic. So I could see s...

 Ok so one picture I like is the RHCP at Los Angeles Lakers games. I like seeing them wearing the merch. So I like some DC teams and thought I contributed to the Nats and Caps championships. But I don't gamble. So one format lately that hasn't seemed troublesome was I'll like the Nintendo 3ds. I really liked Joey from DK Oldies (I thought his enthusiasm was great and also it was good for like the healthcare stuff). I got a shirt from them that I was wearing to HMGS conventions. Some of that was like I read in a Dale Carnegie book people like talking about things they're interested in so that being the gaming. I was blown away by dnd but don't touch it out of safety. So I could be a non playable character. Liking the casino floor. Another good vibe was Johnny Depp stories (not knowing all the stigma to him like having divorced parents apparently but bare with me) it was him having a gambling addiction or being an alcoholic. How cool the Pirates of the Caribbean movie...

 Ok so at one point I was ultra conservative and morally upright. I was being monitored in the US Army and taught EG sex was only for babies or a family. More would be never doing things the wrong way always refusing to do it wrong so attraction? Next was letting go a little bit and being shown it's okay to have sex. So that was more of my liberal and free spirited belief. Thinking that sex was natural and now I was in a good position for it. Another angle was being desensitised from pornography. Thinking of ergo variety where one was never enough always wanting more. So more of that was in the media being shown promiscious men. So I guess I wanted to stay single I thought. Oh explaining myself. So I didn't want to have adultery committed on me. Or I was overseas and the way of life over there was different. I got to go to France or the red light district. I got to live in Wurzburg and Schweinfurt and Munich. In the Army I was around these godly men who were seemingly with lots...

 I keep going back to Charles Dickens with Ebenezer Scrooge. Scrooge or it immediately doesn't work and is regretted see insurmountable debt or other looming troubles. So being miserly. Being a writer or having thought I sired lots of babies that were in my family. Stuff like the British with Middlemarch where a summary was the marriage life being problematic in reality like 'don't build castles in the sky and expect to live in them'. So because of my business acumen (which is actually us army retirement and ssdi) I am supporting the community like charity or including everyone from those incarcerated to those hospitalized the poor house and the jails and the workhouses. JD Salinger so I really ramped up at set my trajectory for when I got older when I was younger. Not wanting to pitter patter out with problems like aids or divorce. Contributing to my parents family and still being their son lots of arrested development. So being a drop out many times. Henry Miller so I...

 The first sexual encounters of mine my have been my aunts. Francine Clark or Regina Luckey. Some of their kids can look a little like me at times. Maybe I was wrong though. Next Lindsay Rosenfeld. So I was at a friends house party and she mounted me. I ejaculated. I never really heard back from her again. Another Belle View Elementary one I suspected was Marley Kimmel Duchaine so I thought she may have broken into my parents house when I got back from Georgia Army. Carrie Urban so at VCU she had me spend the night in her apartment. We slept in the same bed. At one point I thought I'd want to marry her but nothing ever happened. Never heard back from her again. My brothers first born son. So Kim Nesbitt when he had the rental with Wyatt at Fairfax. I spent the night there a few times. All of these women were not while I was awake. My freshman year of VCU list of coeds. Stuart Court apartment girls like Erika Vaughn Blakenship blonde (don't think that one but unconfirmed) Margot...

 Ok let me explain. I don't want complaints or to get kicked out or to have the police called on me all of which have happened before and I don't think I always deserved that. So moving on. I will censor this to avoid setting off admins my intent was not to be offensive or hurtful. Starting off explaining some of this goal in mind was EG I was basically sent to the German brothel. Another was growing up I'd always see these males who were successful with multiple women (before finding out about deal breaker trivia about them) like Jerry Seinfeld John Lennon (Beatles but there's tribute groups as a loophole) Anthony Kiedis (RHCP) the Entourage show Californication or the adult content on the internet those free videos and samplers during my teens. Another jargon on this was logistics things not lining up for reasons like adultery or there were issues in my life I have had resolved somewhat like getting out of debt or having a paycheck. I was a new kid in a town and thing...

 Let me explain. My dad tells me I never play songs. I said there's reasons behind all that. So let me begin. A bad audience can make playing and performing very difficult. See disrespect and being misled and being made fun of. More would be lots of the songs can seem to have semi suicidal ends to them whether that's Kobane or Hendrix or Brian Jones of the Stones. Also it seems like all those songs you know of are copyrighted and I don't want to get sued see how youtube will mute you if you do that some people aren't serious and they'll find the venue won't tolerate that. Also with the entertainment industry where is this actually going? I have obligations I kept like my family or accountability like being in the background of the office. Don't I have a good gig now also I had integrity where I refused to do things the wrong way? Haven't I made progress?  More? Ok so my lessons on how I got to this. I went to college and the artschool showed me that you ...