I chose to get medical help instead of taking a full ride scholarship to becoming a doctor who could be sexually promiscious. Rather than go independent I used and listened to my parents as my caregivers.

 Some of my memoir? So here. I think I made the right choice. What I remember was when I came back to Georgia my NCO was asking me questions about what I wanted and telling me how I could have anything I wanted now. Maybe this was payment for almost completing my military contract? Maybe everything with that worked out in my favor. I didn't get hit with an IED. I qualified for VFW. I came home to my family still being alive and came to help them.

So there was an offer that I could become a doctor. But instead I chose dental. I remember because I think he said it'd take too long to explain and I could only pick so much. So I had dental work done at DDEAMC. My teeth weren't that bad at that point but I thought I definitely needed some work. I got a gold tooth put in. I got metal fillings put in. Later I had my wisdom teeth taken out at the DC VA.

More of that was I chose to be disabled. I listened to reason. I listened to medical professionals. I listened to just about everyone growing up. So instead of becoming a sexually active EG doctor I took my medical retirement and added on ssdi. I took my meds. I gradually became more compliant as a patient. Thinking of this was another was thinking of not regretting getting put in a bad spot. See people losing their judgement. Alcoholics? Substance abusers? So some of that now was like thinking seeing some people who do things full time and maybe passing a little judgement myself. (Another was maybe passing judgement on the priests thinking that by becoming a priest they essentially neglected their own family in the process). So that was like seeing the people trying to make it as artists the painters for example seeing their failures and foolishness.

More of what I thought was going on? I could've sworn women took care of me along my journeys. For a while I was saying that my masturbation was making these babies grow up without problems because of my discipline and professionalism. Conversely they could also be punished for my errors and flaws. I did get tempted and confused before though. But I did try my best and stay the course with my goals. Did I help stop Epstein? But that story was confusing. Prostitution is legal in Germany. 


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