blake uptin

 Catching up? So here was some of the vibe I got. The older men who got with younger women the women can seem to turn on them. Cheating. Giving them suicidal ideations like walking to a creek by yourself and contemplating killing yourself. The infidelity dynamic repeated.  So yes I'd be fine with getting married and starting a family. But it doesn't seem that easy. It's not like my dog where he'll be mine forever and nothing ever really happens. So see how I got to the scenario in the first place? Obligations? I wanted my parents happy alive and married. There were other opportunities that I missed thusly. But back and forth about that hearing that EG college sex would end entirely. So am I dying by pride? See not wanting to embarrass myself trying to strong arm something with the women. It not necessarily being in my favor as much anymore. So letting thing pass me by each time. Maybe be thankful for how many may have happened in the past? What am I supposed to do? It s...

 So catching up. May have said some foolish stuff earlier. Not sure what was and wasn't at the time. So what's going on? Trips to Fort Belvoir with mom. Is this turning into another survey like write up? Quit doing surveys. Was going to use social media but it seems to be a bit of a void. No interactions really. Gone are the myspace days. So busy and drained. Weekday mass. Rosaries. Practicing Catholic. Trips to Alexandria. Sanctuary city and disabled community. Two regions. Harrisonburg the college town. Well I seem to have too much pride to try to get a girl for a relationship. See embarrassment or awkwardness or other downsides. Also another would be not wanting to put my house in jeopardy. Yet in the back of my head I still think there's these women out there who want to have sex with me. So I just got off fetlife. Maybe realizing I'd have to bring that up in confession.  So life these days? At times missing my old hobbies. Things that got shut down or I quit to err...