'melting' um a brief mention of admiration

 so there can be i am non physically gay (also as i age maybe more tolerance growing early on peoples directness hurting but later um thinking of it too like a drug business or these monopolies that can start from that my non secret keeping a term i once heard the gay mafia) but if there is someone whose attractive a sort of alcohol word i could use was charming i can appreciate it in some context um maybe some barriers in the way my military history being known only as a veteran and people grouping me as that isolation or um maybe some other peoples shortcuts having not found out about different hard learned lessons um i said the smokers could have some coolness but that'd be different than smart um so maybe it'd be how i said i'd do a collab like seeing other people emulate there heroes thinking of my dad like leo d or my mom like lela from futurama um when my brother would watch the rock when he was in wrestling still before the breakout movie career or elicit a tearjerker maybe that apparently being almost manipulative from other things hosting giving and me understanding sensitivity not bend over backwards from raw beauty there was names i thought of and later details like being a good provider or coolness some guitar players thinking of heroics or a big one might be referencing movies 

so different people i've seen who seeing what's possible with some of my constraints like as far as my hollywood daydreams liking watching stuff again after recording it publishing online um thinking it's somewhat of a lost cause based on when i was at cavalier (sometimes i'll hear someones advice and hold it like a maxim and i'll greatly help me one thinking you have your married parents you are greatly advantaged like maybe my brother was right when he said we were going directly to bahn mi instead of me with a gold rush from roy's) though there was the paying bartenders and a story like past the point of having kids and starting a family maybe other can'ts i've said like helping my parents or how i saw that myself i could avoid abandonment mention of the stateworkers 

so all these cute boys (and other stuff um having worked in a restaurant and ending up sort of drafted in the army) and then a different one that seemed more guarded and trouble averse was women and trans like their boyfriends parents husbands the term property and invalid so almost like a disability so how i got confused about adultery at one point setting that course um a hermit but um i was thinking of maybe like men's health with magazine covers or to the right one on rolling stone magazine covers thinking how how are people going to be celebs and the irony of watching what can you do i was a guitarist who listened to live music 

different stuff someone stalking me could be liked like breaking in even with the forgive us our trespasses um then other stuff from that saying secret jewish rooms and being part blonde um 

people making an effort to be like there hero and use of the military rank word for charm thought to me charm can be alcohol and then the aj pickett cool dnd files https://www.youtube.com/c/AJPickett maybe think of cool little stories to stuff to from seeing the strangers their backdrops 

so i was thinking like maybe someone out there reads the crazy guy blog um undocumented viewers so it'd be my own what can i do like unlike hst with hells angels i have obligations i kept with my families company i come to the desk and preach the truth

i guess the characters but where are women too on that spectrum of publicity another was i wanted to take pictures to put on tumblr of peoples fashion if there was something good like something i heard of when there was rva mag 

um on the subject of the other gender the opposite sex i'd think one good one maybe the token one like there's black history month um i saw the dolls and heard an actor collected them so that piqued my interest thinking of women's heroes um also with everyone keep going aging though there's 27s dave brockie oderus urungus sort like kiss 

i guess also people not being known for just one thing like sgt wilson was more than  a black nco he was like a trainer and coach and rescuer that being one too liking when there's heroics a story i said was the parents rescue animal rescues like when people have unbelievable strength