a few seconds ago

 watching movie free page scary picture shows up road musician doo doo on stage heroin before talked to parents back story of service dog walking to previous there was traps it was gummy bears mom and dad another raisinets unsure then fire department shirt delivery hyde trial technology yeah so recent conclusion i don't think i want to go to the theater anymore cry was stopped red light last time birchmere poop hidden cam back again seat comforted flea market reassurance bald aside point no tatts it's off again the call so things explained i tell my parents weeks in advance about this turned down then treated like i am on probation i am medicated then lessons i go somewhere and everytime i am treated poorly horribly for no reason i get a call before not allowed to use phone anymore every job ruined saving to pay lots of these i answer every phone call i am pooping i am showering then i can't have sex or isolation enemies disrespect insult harassment i talk so i agree to invitation then canceled then incoherent and more plus other attacks my brothers son needing support and his sister and wife and the rest of the family ate popcorn finished three away container then earlier this can get me out of formation so the funding endless deals so stuff within my price range as protection lord of the rings dolls no complaints my false failed marriage my parents so flotzies showed me the place behind the pines not interested gosling tatted insurance me disabled in town the timer estimated arrival that's what happens then previous left offs the beneficiary families suggestions lots of them mike then constant stefan arriving at overheard now you can't say you didn't get any but so eye robotics and others rick is gone this is not alexandria fortunate medication so the writing the unit avoiding tearjerker so seeing warning a oriental coffee table basically non stoppable so home now the reception two people who had tattoos doesn't upset me but non comprimsal so paying attention and surviving and thus always to tyrants mercenary my own father and mother for no reason then why was i disabled in the first place to today the sequences for all of them if drugs are illegal how did they begin then how do they continue what about when i told the whole thing and then not stopped other parts violence that short cut so unarmed weapons arenas being monitored masturbation humans working dogs my groceries mail order meal kits thus the drug story hitman internet darknet war peace crazy illogical antipsychotic suicide memorial agreement no problems alone and pulling out of trouble day dream possum vermin raccoon the life of david bowie young americans my first publishers were lgbtq i got my start there more raw unedited freewill almost text careful 

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Can someone help with an answer to this scenario? Is this feasible? Should I invest my energy in something else instead? Was instead I meant to have a guitar legacy? Was I tricked and niave? It seems like countless others get away with this and do it the wrong way.

Was this actually to my niave innocent ignorance a extremely stupid idea?

some of my quotes i remembered compiled extracted from fb (that doesn't work)